words....

We all know the person, who, without thinking speaks. They say things that you are sensitive to . things that has absolutely nothing to do with them. I can't stand those people. Why are you talking about something that has nothing to do with you . Commenting on something that you know nothing about, we all know these people, they know about your situation better than you living in your situation.

So, last night a person said a thing that had me awake the entire night, so now not only am a upset about what you said but you stole my sleep and now i am grumpy the entire day because of your comment. SHUT UP NEXT TIME! ask me about the weather or what butter i buy ..

I don't mind people asking questions and commenting and discussing life, issues etc. But you know the prejudice, judgmental and questioning tone of voice....

Don't you just feel that occasionally, you want to take your head off and put it aside. On the night stand or on the edge of the bed next to the cat .

So you go to work in the morning and decide to email the person with the mouth , and they say " oh sorry , didn't mean to upset you " oh that's just dandy , could you also apologize for my lack of sleep..

i think the day i loose my hearing, i will not get a hearing aid, that way i can sleep soundly .

the rest of the day i will try and not bite at any heads around me..

i need rest and a full bottle of rescue drops.

afrique du sud

Sometimes when everything just gets too much to handle, it is natural to want to run away, fly away, immigrate or just disappear. With honesty you cannot read this and say you have not felt like just going to buy a bread and never returning . I have had my share of wanting to run, we have all been so fed up with people, work and politics in this country, the grass always seem greener on the other side.

I could not wait to leave this country, from the moment i touched down on the other side ,everything was great , worked smoothly , efficiently.... i couldn't wait to get back home. 4 days overseas and i begged for a early ticket home.. i had 10 more days to go.. great , i always wanted to leave now all i want to do is go back home. A swallowed a lump in my throat when the pilot said " ladies and gentleman, we have entered into South African airspace, and should be touching down in JHB at 8am" i have never been so happy to hear " Johannesburg" i wanted to belt out the anthem.

there is something about this country, the people, the smell the familiarity of all the chaos. Our own uniqueness, our africaness.

I drive to work and sometimes with a heavy heart, wanting to yet again escape , i look to my side,the lion park, the zebras next to the road, the Giraffe elegantly going about eating leaves , and i realize , the grass is not greener anywhere but here...

Next time i want to escape, i might have to settle for pofadder or klip agter water, or somewhere in the karoo...

But for now i settle for the familiar smell of smog and the endless chaotic que at the postoffice.

the furry 4 leg

the beep op the alarm rings into my dream.. 4:30am, holy hell i have only been asleep for 3hrs, how am i going to do this... note to self, if you get up now, i promise you can sleep this afternoon. get up, get up, GET UP! , i roll out of bed, my eye lids are glued shut. i peer them open and look in the mirror, there is no rational explanation as to why i do this... i have been doing it for a year and a bit.

Turns out, i got out the wrong side of the bed this morning..

i wanted to physically move a Audi this morning...... to the parking bay next door, i am fuming , shit, it's just before 5am how do you fume at this time of the morning. i park here! should i pee here so you can park next door , how do you mark a parking bay , short of spray painting your name on the tar!

the gym management ( or mismanagement as i prefer to call them) forgot that people that are physically active at 5 am , prefer to have cold water from the water cooler , instead of i don't know... WARM WATER!. the conversation went something like this:
" excuse me , the water in the cooler is warm"

the most intelligent answer he could come up with " eish"

oh happy days

" what should i do ?"

" eish , i don't know" .. a hour later I realised, i should have stayed in bed.

I am not a morning person, i stumble back home, very grumpy and exhausted ,determined to get back in bed and get out the other side, to find my furry 4 leg in the kitchen, hey, mommy she purrs.....

the grumpiness seep from me, she rubs her head against me and i realise the day has just gotten off to a great start.


Puuurrrrrrrrfffect

the safety net

My sisters keeper, i am always wiping away tears, mending her broken heart and doing the hospital run. What is the roll of her other half, oh let me guess... hmmmm to roll out of bed in the morning and climb into her self esteem, wonderful, what else could a wife ask for.

She is a kept woman in the true sense of the word,never leaving the house, living in a bricked jail, waiting for her capture to come home.

I dried tears again this morning, for the very last time, i cannot see her fall apart like this over and over again.

I needed reinforcements from the very person that unintentionally planted a seed... a "mighty men" seed. When you initiate something and it goes pear shaped, i believe it is your responsibility to sort it out, to explain where the message went gagga...... to clarify what "mighty men" actually mean. ( or should mean)

i forced my fingers to dial the number, i licked the last of the rescue drops out of the bottle, i tried to remain calm, gave a clear and definite message.... Houston we have a problem, the space shuttle is about to explode and the extinguisher is malfunctioning.

I hang up with a promise that he will clarify the message about how exactly "men" are suppose to me "mighty".

over and out

Thanks dad...

wooooppppeeee, i have a blog, i thought it is something from the stork ad " oh my son created a blog for me , now i can pour all my thoughts into it" uh.. like the latest scone recipe...

Apparently, i have been wrong, every tom, dick and harry's wife has a blog these days so now i am part of the blogging nation.

so, here you will find, the uncut raw truth about everyday stuff, no rose colored glasses here, plain and simple the way it is.